Sunday, July 01, 2007

As I Left


As I left the ATM
with a friend.
As I left the ATM
I looked back—I don’t know why.
As I left the ATM
it happened—I regret it.
As I left the ATM
it was the worst thing.
As I left the ATM
everything fell and crashed for us.
As I left the ATM
I’ll tell you—I will I will.
As I left the ATM
our life was over then.
As I left the ATM
damn me it happened
damn me for looking back.
As I left the ATM
where was God then?
where were my senses?
As I left the ATM
I didn’t think—didn’t think I’m telling you!
As I left the ATM
it just happened—just came out.
As I left the ATM
why this—why this of all things?
As I left the ATM
what are we to do now?
As I left the ATM
we were just walking away.
As I left the ATM
why didn’t I just keep walking?
As I left the ATM
I turned—somehow I turned.
As I left the ATM
the worst thing in the world.
As I left the ATM
I’m going to tell you I will
I’m building it.
As I left the ATM
I need to shock you
—will you be?
As I left the ATM
please be please be upset.
As I left the ATM
I turned­ and get ready now.
As I left the ATM
I turned to that fucking machine.
As I left the ATM
I turned and said—thank you.

As I left the ATM
it’s true—it is it really is.
As I left the ATM
what’s happening?
what’s happening to us?
As I left the ATM
fuck me for this fuck me.
As I left the ATM
I turned and I spoke to it I did.
As I left the ATM
I said it and then heard it
—but so what?
As I left the ATM
I heard it and stopped
and all the world broke.
As I left the ATM
I wanted to cry
but I laughed—so what?
As I left the ATM
you know what happened now.
As I left the ATM
June 14th 2006
with a friend.



Chris Gutkind


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